When Bruno was a small boy he learned only a few things from his father, one of which was his ability to party hard. All the other manly traits that Bruno’s father had were never passed down. But his ability to party harder than any one else was his greatest trait. In middle school Bruno was known for his style and parties. Everyone weekend all the little boys and girls would ask Bruno “where is the party?”.  So, Bruno started to host late night parties for all the neighborhood kids. These parties grew from little hang outs to alcohol raged orgies. Bruno knew that there were bigger things than just all the attention he got from hosting these orgies. During the summer of 1982, Bruno hosted his first poker party. Naked men and women would serve cards and alcohol all night long. That summer, Bruno made over $250,000,000 dollars, making him the coolest kid in school. Bruno had so much money that summer that he decided to never throw a party again. He dropped out of school and pursued a career in “whatever the fuck I want to do”. He did drugs, he did guys, he did girls, he did whatever the fuck he wanted to do. His father, who once was the party animal of Austria was so proud of his son for his ability to party but because of his homosexuality he did not pass down his golden dildo. Instead, he took his prized dildo out to sea and released it in the ocean, never to be seen again.